Mixed Girl Thoughts

occasionally i wonder
if i am worth the trouble
the stress, the tears, or the fears

i feel like i am in a dark room
feeling for a switch i cannot find
there's people shouting
from the otherside
trying to guide me
but i've lost my guides

my heart and my mind
are no longer intertwined
they are separate beings
pulling apart inside

maybe one day
i'll find
the place where i belong
where i'm no longer in a divide
not separated from the inside
between my heart and mind

floating in dead space
the people
separate face
who i am
who i was
who i wish to be
trying to crack the code
to synthesise all three

combine, absorb, be
make peace with the pain from all three of me
understand the inevitability
lost in translation
no fluidity
they're disjointed
all three of me

maybe one day
i'll find
the place where i belong
where i'm no longer in a divide
not separated from the inside
between my heart and mind
together, all of me.